Forcing Easter
by chaann
Summary: No one wants to celebrate Easter with Deidara. SIGH. Too bad for Sasori though as Deidara cleverly plans a day of secret egg hunting for him - if he likes it of not! Non-yaoi. Swearing. Three part fic!
1. Chapter 1

hoppy easter. part one of three. part two will be up tomorrow.

* * *

"No Deidara, that's gay"

"No Deidara, we're not babies."

"No Deidara, that costs too much money!"

"No Deidara, that's for fucking heathens!"

"No Deidara, we're criminals."

"No Deidara, I'm on a diet."

"No Deidara, I don't eat chocolate."

"Sorry Sempai! I have a mission!"

Deidara let out a loud wail of utter sadness as he flopped down on his bed. Everyone had turned him down! No one wanted to celebrate Easter with him! Sure he didn't even believe in the goddamn rabbit, but it sure was fun having a hunt and eating chocolate and marshmallows treats. Absolute yes to candy. Especially jellybeans, those were his favourite and he'd be damned if he didn't get any this year!

He lulled his head to face the other side and eyed up his partner. Sasori was his last chance. Deidara inwardly laughed, like hell his Danna would celebrate Easter with him. He was so cold and stoic, he wouldn't even a reason as to why he wouldn't do it. Just a grunt. Without a doubt. TchHe the bastard didn't even look up or ask what was wrong with the blond and he ran in and wailed in distress! He just sat there and worked.

Suddenly a thought popped in his head. 'What if I don't tell him he's celebrating it...'

Quickly Deidara jumped up and ran out if the room slamming the door. That's what he would do! He would force his Danna to Easter it up with him! All he had to do was go to the store and buy the items for his plan. Even if he wasn't the one looking for the eggs, he would surely have fun making his cold Danna subconciously do so...

Speaking of which...

Sasori slowly looked up from his work and stared at the door for a moment. Whatever.


	2. Chapter 2

ok. see you tomorrow for the last part!

* * *

Sasori slowly opened his eyes - It's not like he slept, but he did rest to store up chakra for the next day. He gave a click as he began to 'wake up' and quickly froze as he looked down at his chest. Sitting there he saw a little red stuffed rabbit with a white ribbon around its neck - where it came from, who knows and really? Who cares. He immediately got up letting the rabbit fall and looked at the bed beside his, the brat was already up and gone...

Whatever. He shrugged it off and got up to walk over to his desk where he opened one of the drawers to grab a recipe for a poison he was running low on. He noticed he was pretty much out of it yesterday and decided he would wait for the next day to take care of it. His eyebrows furrowed once he opened the drawer to see a little pink plastic egg inside.

He poked it and watched it wobble. It didn't look dangerous, and certainly didn't explode like most weird things did in his shared room with a known bomber, so he picked it up an opened it. In it held the leaves he needed to make the poison and right underneath the egg was the recipe itself. Sasori shrugged it off. Whatever.

After he was done mixing the poison he went to put it on his shelf with a few of his other poisons. When he got there a little purple plastic egg caught his attention. He blinked at it and gave it a poke and again, watched it wobble about. This one wasn't dangerous either, so Sasori picked up the egg and popped it open and saw a sticker label in it. He glanced over and saw also a bright pink pen with a happy blue rabbit figure on the end. It being the closest writing utensil, he used the pen and wrote the name of the poison on the label and stuck it on. Well that was handy...but he shook the coincidence off. Whatever.

Sasori looked down and cringed as saw his appearance - his clothes were wrinkled and had some droplets of the poison on the shirt. He sighed and walked to his wardrobe and looked though his collection of all black shirts, but stopped once he saw a little plastic blue egg at the floor of the wardrobe. He squatted down and gave the egg a little poke and watched it wobble. Yet again it seemed safe so he picked it up and opened it - inside was a laundry detergent cube. That would come in handy for cleaning the poison mark on his shirt. Sasori briefly wondered how it got there, but brushed it off. Whatever.

After he changed his shirt, he walked to the laundry machine and did a load of his and Deidara's clothes (since the idiot was too lazy to do it himself). The redhead went to put the clothes in but at the bottom of the machine there was a little plastic yellow egg. Sasori hopped up on the machine to reach in and poked it. It wobbled and nothing else happened so he grabbed it and climbed out of the machine. He tossed the clothes in the machine and started it and once he was done, he opened the yellow egg - inside was a chocolate. Sasori didn't have to eat, but he sure did like chocolate. He brushed the whole thing off and ate the chocolate. Whatever.

After eating the chocolate he decided to head to the kitchen. He hadn't seen the brat all morning and decided knowing would ease his thoughts as to where that moron had run off to. Once he entered the kitchen he saw Itachi making miso soup for breakfast.

"Sasori, could you pass me a couple bowls please?"

Sasori silently nodded and turned to the cupboard and grabbed two bowls. Inside the top bowl sat a little orange plastic egg. He reached into the bowl and poked the egg. All it did was wobble, so Sasori took the egg out and handed the two bowls to Itachi just as Kisame entered the room and sat down at the table. Nobody paid any attention to Sasori so he left.

He left the kitchen and made it to the living area where he then looked down at the egg and opened it - inside was a small bottle of puppet lubricant. Did he need more? He brushed it off. Whatever.

Sasori slipped the lubricant into his pocket and decided to go to have a brief look for the blond outside. Once he got out there he immediately regretted it...

"Hey stick dick! Could you throw me my scythe to cut this fucker?" Kakuzu launched a fist at Hidan and hit hidan square in the jaw, "NOW WOULD BE GREAT YOU ASS!"

Sasori sighed and walked over to the said weapon that had managed to get out of range for Hidan. Once he bent down he froze as he saw another little plastic egg beside a rock. He got down and shuffled on his squat towards it and poked the egg. He watched it wobble about and almost picked it up if it weren't for, "FUCKER HURRY!"

Sasori let out a 'tch' and swiped up the egg and pocketed it before turning around an grabbing the princesses scythe and tossing it to him. Sasori quickly turned around though and grabbed the egg from his pocket to see what was inside. He looked in to see a three shiny new screw driver heads - ones in particular he knew he used a lot. Again, this was handy, but he brushed it off. Whatever.

Sasori not immediately seeing the brat outside gave up, so he walked back to his and Deidara's shared room to work on his puppets. When he got there he checked and he indeed needed more lubricant and the one he got from the egg was a good quality too, so he could put it to good use.

He walked to the trash and threw out the old empty bottle only to glance and stop on his way back to his desk. There with red rabbit from earlier still sitting on his bed, near it was a little plastic green egg, naturally he walked over to it and poked it. Being on the bed it didn't wobble as much, but it also sure didn't explode. Sasori picked it up and opened it - inside was another chocolate. He popped it in his mouth and shrugged it off. Whatever.

When he walked to his desk and looked around. His eyebrows furrowed as his eyes wandered the place. He opened drawer after drawer and soon began looking all around the room. He looked under the beds, all the shelves, in Deidara's wardrobe, the closet, his side table but he couldn't find anymore eggs!

Sasori let out a scowl as he realized he could be making art or poisons instead of looking for more colourful eggs, so he plopped himself on his chair and started working. Sasori reached into his pocket and grabbed all the eggs he had collected and lined them up only to scowl at them and busy himself with work.

With each glance at the egg he quickly began to get agitated and took a deep breath to shrug it off. He grit his teeth. He couldn't do it - he couldn't focus!

He ran his hand through his hair and pressed harshly on his pencil until the lead snapped. He growled and looked at the empty cup on his desk that SHOULD hold pencils - but it was empty. He grabbed the cup on his desk to see if there was a small stub of one at the bottom and gave a look inside.

A smile twisted on his face as he looked in and saw a small plastic white egg, he used his broken pencil and poked it, watching it wobble around in the cup. Just like all the other ones before, it looked safe so he dumped the cup over in his hand to grab it and opened it - inside was a brand new metal sharpener that looked very sharp and ready to be used.

Sasori let out a silent squeal of delight and sharpened his pencil. This one egg lasted him all day as he worked, up until dinner when he finally saw his partner.

"Sup, Danna, yeah?"

Sasori gave the blond a critical look. He was far too aloof and unresponsive, usually Deidara wore his emotions on his sleeve and if he was up to something, you knew.

"Where were you today, Brat?"

A cocky smirk plastered itself on the blonds face as he sat at the table, "Aw! Did Danna miss me? I wasn't on my mission for too long was I?"

Sasori gave a glare as he fiddled with an empty plastic egg in his pocket that he subconsciously brought with him. He knew the blond was responsible - he knew the blond wasn't on a mission today as well. Tobi and Zetsu were the ones out and about, and besides, the brat ran out of their room yesterday in a big hurry. Yeah, he remembered that.

He looked up and came out if his deep thought and froze. There it was - with a bite of a bottom lip and a mischievous twinkle in those blue eyes. He knew what was up, there was no more hiding it. Without a doubt the blond was behind this, and he would get him back. He would get the brat for forcing Easter on him without him knowing.


	3. Chapter 3

ok bad ending but im done. byeeee

* * *

The next morning after Easter, Deidara woke with a yawn as he snuggled into something soft and wrapped his arms around it. It took a moment before he finally opened his eyes and jumped up at the giant yellow stuffed duck sitting in his bed. A large blue ribbon was tied around his neck and hanging on the front was a large red egg. Deidara looked at it and gave it a poke, he watches as it swayed back and fourth on the ribbon. It sure didn't look dangerous... so Deidara popped it open.

A huge grin smeared itself on his face as he looked inside and saw it full of colourful jellybeans, his favorite. Amongst the jellybeans was a small piece of paper the size of a fortune in a cookie. Deidara wiggled around the egg making the paper more visible until it was uncovered where he reached in and read that on it said:

Thank you, Brat. Happy Easter.

"Damn Danna that's gay. We're not babies, nor heathens, we're criminals! Also it's a big waste of money yeah. Besides, I'm on a diet and don't even eat chocolate." He chuckled in a mocking voice while popping a jellybean in his still smiling mouth. "I wonder if I could force him to celebrate more holidays with me...nah he's caught on to me. At least I could force Easter, yeah."

Deidara clung to the duck and laughed yet again as raised the egg and chugged back some more jellybeans, "mmnf..I bet he looked sho shtupid buying dis shit."


End file.
